Review: The Invisible Wall

The Invisible Wall

By~ Harry Bernstein

Quote: "Joe already told me. I'm very grateful to Arthur. I think it was a wonderful thing that he did, and I'm going to make up a basket of fruit for him. But he's a Christian, and I don't want him in the house and I don't want you in his house."~ Mother

(pg. 70)

Started: August 8, 2017

Finished: August 13, 2017

paperback/297 pages

From the cover:

On the eve of World War I, in a small English mill town, Harry Bernstein's family struggles to make ends meet. Harry's father earns little money at the Jewish tailoring shop and brings home even less, preferring to spend his wages drinking and gambling. Harry's mother, devoted to her children and fiercely resilient, survives on her dreams: new shoes for young Harry, her daughter's marriage to the local rabbi. Then harry's older sister does the unthinkable: She falls in love with a Christian boy. But they are separated by an "invisible wall" that divides Jewish families on one side of the street from Christian families on the other. When Harry unwittingly discovers the secret affair, he must choose between the morals he's been taught all his life, his loyalty to his selfless mother, and what he knows to be true in his own heart.

My Review:

I am always a sucker for a good memoir and this was no disappointment.

I have always been fascinated with other people's stories. Who they are and how they got there.

Harry Bernstein does a wonderful job of showing the reader exactly where he came from and how he struggled, dreamed and thrived in his situation. 

I will say I feel like the "love story" aspect of the book was overrated. Yes, it was a huge experience in Harry's life and the book is HIS memoir but in my opinion the "Invisible Wall" was there with or without the Jewish/Christian affair between his sister and Arthur.

The religions were separated already.

He shows that by the way the headmaster, neighbors, and peers treated them.

They were only cordial or interacted on a have to basis already.

As he shows in using them to light the fires or when having to shop at a Christian store.

In some ways they were dependent on the Christians yet the prejudice/dislike was mutual.

Yes, the affair stirred up even more issues and caused more tragedy and heartache.(As it had previously between Sarah and Freddy). I'm sure for them it was just as Harry describes. Horrific for their mother and unsettling for the Christians also.

I just don't feel that was the biggest struggle they were dealing with.

His father was a drunk who wasted what money they did have. He was violent and feared by his entire household. The mother seemed to dream through her children to the point of pushing them away completely. She may have been resilient, but I see a woman desperate and hopeless.

Again, it's just my opinion. I completely admire Mr. Bernstein for his willingness to retell his story to the world and to let us share his memories.

He is a wonderful writer and although he was 96 years old when The Invisible Wall was published, he managed to finish 2 more books The Dream:A Memoir and The Golden Willow before he passed away in 2011 at the age of 101!

I definitely will read his other two books.

And you can also find out more about him and his life here>> Harry Bernstein

I hope anyone who loves a great memoir. A true story or anyone needing to be reminded how prejudices can cause more harm than the good some believe by sticking to what they have been taught. This is a wonderful example of how fear and hatred lead to hurt, harm and even death.

5 Stars for The Invisible Wall

Review: Real Marriage

Real Marriage: 

The Truth about

 Sex, Friendship, and Life Together

by 

Mark & Grace Driscoll

Quote:" The greatest gift a grace a man can have is a pious, God-fearing, home-loving wife, whom he can trust with all his goods, body, and life itself, as well as having her as the mother of his children." ~ Martin Luther pg 23

Started: March 4, 2013

Finished: March 14, 2013

Hardcover/249 pages

From the cover:

Traveling the world, raising five kids, speaking to thousands, Pastor Mark Driscoll and his wife, Grace, don't live in a bubble. They know we live in a " hook-up, shack up, and break up" culture. They've seen the divorce rates, heard the sexual abuse statistics, they've been statistics themselves. All of which makes them realistic and sympathetic.

But that's not why we are qualified to write this book.

Mark and Grace know and respect God's Word, and they've experienced it's power to transform their marriage. Today, In this culture. Those are their qualifications.

Unflinchingly honest and direct, they describe God's plan for marriage, explain how it has changed their marriage, and dive into the issues that keep us from it, including a lack of friendship in marriage, previous sexual abuse, and the use of pornography. and you'll find the answers to some sex-related questions that you just can't ask your own pastor.

If you want the straight truth wrapped in the grace of the gospel, read this book. If you're asking questions you think the church would never answer, open the pages. And if you're not sure lifelong soul-mates are even possible in the 21st century, read and be encouraged by what the grace and power of God can do for your marriage.

My Review:

I absolutely loved this book. It was so well written, wonderfully descriptive and truly honest. I know, little by little and through God's grace this book is and will continue to be a blessing to myself and my marriage.

No matter how many or how few issues you feel your marriage has, this book can and probably will help you and your spouse in some way!

The book is divided into specific topic chapters. 

1.New Marriage, Same Spouse

2.Friend with Benefits

3. Men and Marriage

4. The Respectful Wife

5. Taking out the Trash 

and so on.

This book covers everything from porn obsession and how it can destroy a marriage to what is the difference between lawful and helpful.(Just because you CAN do it, doesn't mean you should. Is it helpful to YOUR specific marriage?)

It uses reference to scripture in almost every question or subject(which I LOVED). It gives tons of helpful statistics, testimonies and study results to help you understand better.

This book shows you right from wrong, how to prioritize(take out the trash) and how to be open, honest and start over from any stage of marriage.

You learn tips, prayers and methods to slowly, gradually transform your marriage into what God had planned for you and your spouse! It even has a "plan" for you to set up and use as a guideline for goals, dreams and things you want to accomplish as a married couple.( How can we get where we want to be next week, year, in 5 years?)

I highly recommend this book to any Christian couples. No matter how wonderful you think your own marriage is, everyone can benefit from this book!

Definitely 5 stars*****

Review: The Sealed Letter

The Sealed Letter

by Emma Donoghue

Quote: " Liberty! Let every woman do that which is right in her own eyes!" -Fido pg. 168

Started: Dec. 21, 2012

Finished: Jan. 2, 2013

397 pages/hardcover

From the cover:

Based on a scandalous divorce case

that gripped England in 1864, The Sealed Letter blends fact and invention to create a riveting, provocative drama of friends, lovers, and divorce-Victorian style.

Miss Emily "Fido" Faithfull is a "woman of business" and a spinster pioneer in the British women's movement, independent of mind but naively trusting of heart. Distracted from her cause by the sudden return of her once-dear friend, the unhappily wed Helen Codrington, Fido is swept up in the intimate details of Helen's failing marriage to a stuffy admiral and her obsessive affair with a young army officer. What begins as a loyal effort to help a friend explodes into a courtroom drama that rivals the Clinton affair- complete with stained clothing, accusations of adultery, counterclaims of rape, and a mysterious sealed letter that could destroy more than one life.

  The Sealed Letter is a page-turner of the most intelligent sort. Brought to life by Emma Donoghue's vivid characterizations and matchless eye for detail, here is a story remarkably relevant to contemporary issues of infidelity, propriety, and the media.

My Review:

I have no idea how to give this review. First, this was NOT a " page-turner of the most intelligent sort", nor did it have "vivid characters". I want to say that given the time when this "scandal" took place then yes, I agree the book is "fitting". Seeing that it was actually written in 2008!!!! I cannot believe that Miss Donoghue meant for this story to come out the way it did.  It's almost as if she was afraid to include ANY details or "meat" to the story. I just felt like the whole book was one big secret that vaguely got revealed in the last 5 or so pages. Again with no real detail or insight. Maybe she got too wrapped up in the what was appropriate in 1864, and forgot to write in details of the story that are appropriate in the 21st century! 

Then of course there are the " character", which I use the term loosely. I couldn't relate to or believe any of them. the most interesting had to be the nosy, over dramatic,and conniving, Mrs. Watson. At least she showed some "character". she seems to be the only character Donoghue decided to reveal or show her true colors about. 

I haven't been pleased with Google or Wiki on this whole subject either. There is almost no, if little information on the Codrington divorce. I like to do my own research on any non-fiction books I read and was very disappointed to find almost nothing. There are several other book reviews on The Sealed Letter and several opinion posts but no real facts! There are tons of bio pages on Emily Faithfull but not one picture of Helen Codrington. the only info I can find on Henry Codrington mainly focuses on his military career. And whatever happened to their two daughters???

* 2 stars*

Review: The Glass Castle

The Glass Castle

by Jeannette Walls

Quote: "It's good we raised you young' uns to be tough, Because this is not a house for the faint of heart."~ Dad(Rex Walls) pg. 150

Started: Sept. 5, 2012

Finished: Sept. 11, 2012

288 pages/paperback

From the cover:

The Glass Castle is a remarkable memoir of resilience and redemption, and a revelatory look into a family at once deeply dysfunctional and uniquely vibrant. When sober, Jeannette's brilliant and charismatic father captured his children's imagination, teaching them physics, geology, and how to embrace life fearlessly. But when he drank, he was dishonest and destructive. Her mother was a free spirit who abhorred the idea of domesticity and didn't want the responsibility of raising a family.

 The Walls children learned to take care of themselves. They fed, clothed, and protected one another, and eventually found their way to New York. Their parents followed them, choosing to be homeless even as their children prospered.

 The Glass Castle is truly astonishing-a memoir permeated by the intense love of a peculiar but loyal family.

My Review:

Wow! This is definitely one of those OMG books! This is going to be hard to review. There is so much to this book, and more because it is a memoir, non-fiction, no faking, the real deal! Wow!

I have always been intrigued to learn real stories about real people. I am fascinated with learning about other people, places, times. Also, being a parent myself I love reading about people's childhoods. What they perceive their parents done right or wrong. As a parent what did they feel was the right choice at the time and so forth. 

This book would be the "What NOT to do" as a parent handbook!

Seriously, some of the things these children went through(hunger, poor living conditions, criminal activity, injuries untreated, sexual abuse...) that were ALL well known by BOTH parents! These things were brushed off or even laughed at as "learning experiences" that would "toughen them up" while running out of money for booze, cigarettes or art supplies were major issues. To me it was a classic case of book smart, intelligent people who have absolutely NO common sense or the mental ability to deal with any "real life" situations.

I have heard so many people's reviews about how RoseMary(Mom) was raised by a distant, rough around the edges, fearless mother who seems to have taught her daughter(however unintentional) to be a free-spirited, make your own rules up as you go kind of parent. Well, I think that is pure BS! I did read Half Broke Horses and I never got any clue as to that type of parenting. RoseMary(and Rex) were two of the most selfish people I have ever heard of. They had SO many chances, opportunities, ways of making a much better, easier life for themselves and their children who had no choice in the matter. Yet, they CHOSE to live in poverty, involve themselves and their children in criminal activity and let them be exposed to so many things no human, let alone a child should ever have to face. For what? All because they wanted to be greedy, make their own rules, and defy laws and society and how they felt society viewed and judged them. To prove a point to who? America, civilized people, their parents....

I will call this book sad, tragic even, but I have absolutely NO pity for RoseMary or Rex Walls.

*5 stars* for an amazing story written with complete honesty and heart

Review: Hidden

Hidden

by Cathy Glass

Quote: " Isn't it incredible, when you think about the amount of paperwork that follows us around here, that they've managed to live with none of it and survive for five years?" ~ Cathy pg. 92

Started: July 20, 2012

Finished: August 4, 2012

paperback/ 350 pages

From the cover:

As soon as Tayo was brought to Cathy's home for placement, she was puzzled. The social worker had no records for Tayo: no school files, family history or medical records. It was as if Tayo didn't exist.

Tayo maintained strict silence when Cathy asked about his past. Only when she glimpsed a scar on his arm did Tayo's story gradually begin to unfold. Cathy learned of his abduction by his drink- and drug-dependent mother, and the sinister van with blackened windows that picked him up every morning at daybreak and ferried him across London.

In her twenty-three years as a foster carer, Cathy had never seen a case as horrific as Tayo's nor had she met a boy with such loyalty, inner resolve and strength.

My Review: 

Another great book from Cathy Glass. I really admire what she has done and continues to do. I am so glad she decided to write and share all the stories/cases with readers. she truly has seen some amazing children. It only validates the evil vs. good in this world. She gives us hope through her works that for some children there really is a light at the end of a dark tunnel. It Hidden she shows us how a child's mind works. how whether positive or negative the action is, children will follow by example. While luckily for Tayo, he did have a good start and held on to most of the basics, he was still influenced by his mother and his reactions showed this. Children are such wonderful creatures. It still is beyond me how anyone could choose to put their own child in danger for such selfish reasons. Addictions have such an effect on so many, rarely ever just the one abusing the substance. Sadly, something bad usually  has to happen before the abuse is addressed.

This is one more case of how many situations go unnoticed and unresolved for way too long. How many children suffer abuse and neglect before something triggers an alarm? Before the right person, situation or mistake make people aware! Hooray! for Cathy Glass and making us more aware!

* 5 stars*

Review: Don't Forget To Write

Don't Forget to Write

By Pam Hobbs

Quote: " More likely we'll be sold for half price tomorrow. ~ Iris pg. 70

Started: June 29, 2012

Finished: July 8, 2012

paperback/ 347 pages

From the Cover:

In June 1940, ten-year-old Pam Hobbs took the long journey from her council home in Leigh-on-Sea to faraway rural Derbyshire.

 In some foster homes Pam found a second family, with babies to look after, car rides and picnics. But other billets took a more sinister turn, as the adults found it easy to exploit the children in their care.

 Returning home, the war was far from over. Making do with rations, dodging bombs and helping with the war effort, Pam and her family struggled to get by.

  In Don't Forget To Write, Pam describes a time that was full of overwhelming hardship and devastation; yet also of kindness and humour, resilience and courage.

My Review:

 I loved this book for many reasons. First off I enjoyed reading a book based on World War II from a non-Jewish view point. I have always been fascinated with the subject but have rarely if ever seen it wrote from this side of the fence. It was wonderfully written by an child evacuee that shares her experiences and daily life throughout such a traumatic and uncertain time for anyone, let alone a ten-year-old child.

 This story made me feel as if a grandmother or old friend was right there with me, telling their story. It brought this story to life! 

 Some may get mixed up with all the characters(7 children, 2 parents, aunts, uncles, foster families), but it is well worth it to read it through. Coming from a large family of story tellers, this book was wonderful for me!

*4 stars!*

Review: Girl, Interrupted

Girl, Interrupted

by Susanna Kaysen

Quote: "She's completely blotto. Of course, they're giving her something." ~ Georgina pg. 23

started: April 10, 2012

finished: April 12, 2012

paperback(school edition)

168 pages

From the cover:

In 1967, after a session with a psychiatrist she'd never seen before, eighteen-year-old Susanna Kaysen was put into a taxi and sent to McLean Hospital. She spent most of the next two years on the ward for teenage girls in a psychiatric hospital as renowned for its famous clientele-Sylvia Plath, Robert Lowell, James Taylor, and Ray Charles- as for its progressive methods of treating those who could afford its sanctuary.

   Kaysen's memoir encompasses horror and razor-edged perception while providing vivid portraits of her fellow patients and their keepers. It is a brilliant evocation of a "parallel universe" set within the kaleidoscopically shifting landscape of the late sixties. Girl, Interrupted is a clear-sighted, unflinching document that gives lasting and specific dimension to our definitions of sane and insane, mental illness and recovery.

My Review:

 This is one that I wish, I had I known of it years ago, and had read the book  before seeing the movie. Honestly, the entire time I was reading it I kept seeing Wynonna, Angelina, Brittney, and Whoopi! With that said, it was still a good book. I can say that the movie is pretty much spot on the book. The only big difference is apparently, Valerie(Whoopi Golberg), the head nurse, was a tall, lean, blonde, twenty-something woman!

The book actually does give somewhat of an epilogue which was nice, but since it is non-fiction and Susanna doesn't have contact with any of the characters anymore, there isn't much detail into what happens next for them. 

  This is still a good read. It does make us question what makes a person sane or insane. By whose guidelines are we judged/labeled/diagnosed? If we are insane, do we ever truly "recover"? One of my biggest questions regarding medicating certain "insane" is if they aren't curable, what is the medicine for? Honestly, in SOME cases, I believe they are medicated more so that the caretakers can handle them easier, or not have to deal with them at all. I understand some may need it to protect themselves or others, but it is so heartbreaking seeing people doped up into a comatose state...for what? How sedated do they need to be before they are "safe"?  Which would be worse, believing that you see clowns and water running on the walls, or being strapped to a bed drooling uncontrollably?  Believing that you have 3, 4, more people in your head telling you what to do and not do or being wheeled around in a chair and spoon-fed because you are too doped up to stand or feed yourself?

What are your thoughts? Any opinions on the book/movie or subject?

Review: The Nazi Officer's Wife

The Nazi Officer's Wife

by Edith Hahn Beer

Quote: 

Out of thirty-six students in my class, three were Jews- Steffi Kanagur, Erna Marcus, and I. One day somebody wrote on their desks: " Jews, get out, go to Palestine!" Nobody wrote on my desk, because those girls were from Poland and I came from Austria and they seemed (actually they were) more overtly Jewish than I was.  It was 1930. ~ Edith pg. 33

Started: March 26, 2012

Finished: March 29, 2012

paperback

305 pages

From the cover:

Edith Hahn was an outspoken young woman in Vienna when the Gestapo forced her into a ghetto and then into a labor camp. When she returned home months later, she went underground. With the help of a Christian friend, she emerged in Munich as Grete Denner. There she met Werner Vetter, a Nazi Party member who fell in love with her. Despite Edith's protests and her eventual confession that she was Jewish, he married her and kept her identity a secret. 

   In wrenching detail, Edith recalls a life of constant, almost paralyzing fear. She tells how German officials casually questioned the lineage of her parents; how during childbirth she refused all painkillers, afraid that in an altered state of mind she may reveal something of her past; and how, after her husband was captured by the Soviets, she was bombed out of her house and had to hide while drunken Russian soldiers raped women on the street.

   Despite the risk it posed to her life, Edith created a remarkable record of survival. She saved every document, as well as photographs she took inside labor camps. Now part of the permanent collection at the Holocaust Memorial Museum in Washington D.C., these hundreds of documents, several of which are included in this volume, form the fabric of a gripping new chapter in the history of the Holocaust- complex, troubling, and ultimately triumphant.

  

My Review:

 This book was AMAZING! I have somewhat of an obsession with learning anything I can about the Holocaust. It is, for me, one of the most fascinating, while tragic events ever!  Fact, fiction or documentary, I will probably learn something new about it. As for The Nazi Officer's Wife, it was one of the most well written and "real" stories I have read. Edith was such a strong, determined woman. How can we, in today's world even imagine what it took to not only survive such a time, but to survive, live, and re-live these events...this life, to show, educate and touch so many others in a book. Her written story will linger with me forever. I will definitely pass this book along to anyone interested in reading and learning more. I also found a movie, by the same name, based on the book. I cannot wait to watch it!

Check out these links!

Obituary- Edith Hahn Beer

Movie Trailer~

Review: Into The Wild

Into The Wild

by Jon Krakauer

Quote: " He didn't think the odds applied to him. we were always trying to pull him back from the edge."~ Walt pg. 109

started: March 14, 2012

finish: March 21, 2012

From the cover:

In April 1992 a young man from a well-to-do family hitchhiked to Alaska and walked alone into the wilderness north of Mt. McKinley. his name was Christopher Johnson McCandless. He had given $25,000 in savings to charity, abandoned his car and most of his possessions, burned all the cash in his wallet, and invented a new life for himself. Four months later, his decomposed body was found by a moose hunter...

My Review:

I"m so glad a  fried let me borrow this book. I have mixed feeling about Christopher. One minute I could totally agree and relate with his strong opinions and feelings toward a subject and then other times I just kept thinking.." What?, how could he think like that!!". I understand the parts about feeling betrayed and used. Everyone deals with emotions in their own ways. He definitely had some perfectionist and over zealous times where he seems to have lost all sense of reality and responsibility. 

I have heard people say often even the best intentions may not turn out as we plan. this is a classic case. Or maybe he knew, maybe deep inside his determined mind, he knew there was a good chance it would be his end.

No matter why the reasons or how insane or unorthadox they may seem to us, he thought he was really "living the life", taking a hold of his own destiny...and he did! He did it his way and despite the consequences, no one stopped him, he didn't play by any rules and he was "free". He had accomplished something his way.

Review: Damaged

Damaged

by Cathy Glass

Quote:  " If I'm going to be able to meet this child's needs, I replied, ' it's important that I'm given all the relevant information. Could you check and get back to me, please?" pg. 63

started: Feb. 23, 2012

finished: Feb. 25, 2012

From the cover:

A deeply moving story of how one foster carer's profound patience and love unlocked a little girl's darkest, most painful secrets

 Cathy Glass had fostered fifty children over twenty years but none of them had been as disturbed as Jodie, a troubled eight-year-old whose violence and aggression had seen off five foster carers in just four months. When Jodie arrived, Cathy had no idea what lay beneath Jodie's shocking behavior, which included smearing feces all over the house, erupting into violent rages and even cutting herself. Little by little, as Jodie's rage was met with patience and understanding, she began to trust Cathy, and to confide the dreadful background which had led to her present torment.

My Review:

Wow! This book was one of the best and worst books I think I have ever read!

It is such an amazing story. I will say first off that it holds nothing back as far as details in what this precious child encountered. As hard as it was to read and get through this book, thinking of how much worse it must have been to actually live through it all. I can only pray that more people continue to do the work of Cathy Glass and more people become aware of the very real life horrors and evil that are around each of us. I will definitely be reading some of the other books written by Cathy Glass 

She continues to be a foster carer in the UK and also has many books written on different children/cases she has lived with over the years. as well as many books devoted to helping others and also family living books.

I give Damaged 5 stars!

Review: Sickened

Sickened

A Memoir of a Munchausen by Proxy MBP childhood

By Julie Gregory

Quote: " Look, there has got to be something wrong with this kid, she can't even do one simple test. This has never happened before; she must have something seriously going on here. Can the doctor just please look at her?" ~ Mom  pg. 62

started: Jan. 25

finished: Jan 27, 2012

*This post contains affiliate links

From the cover: 

A young girl is perched on the cold chrome of yet another doctor's examining table. Just twelve she is tall, skinny and weak. It's 4 o'clock and she hasn't been allowed to eat anything all day. Her mother on the other hand, seems curiously excited. She is about to suggest open- heart surgery on her child to " get to the bottom of this". She checks her teeth for lipstick and, as the doctor enters, shoots the girl a warning glance. The child will not ruin her plans.

My Review:

This book was a hard one to get through. Any dealing with child abuse, neglect or pain should be, in my opinion.  Julie Gregory makes you feel like you are there. The scenery and scenarios come to life. While most of the book Julie is the naive, immature, believing victim, she shows that with God's faith and love she had strength. A strength that she had all along but never knew. Through the blood, sweat, fear, broken bones,chaos, and confusion she survived. I really liked that it does have a "happy" ending, yet the scars will remain. 

A few things I didn't like were that she was so separated from her brother and other than a few trips back and forth(which were obviously hard) the book never really gives much of his feelings or opinions. Also, that her father was so cowardly toward the mother's behavior and also gullible.

My rating: 3 1/2 stars

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